Because sexuality is so personal and private, we don’t talk enough about it. Even in this age when we can pull up all kinds of info about sex on the web, it’s easy to get stuck in the caverns of our own minds, confused about sex and attached to beliefs that just aren’t true. If [...]
As a sexual empowerment coach, I get to hear a lot about people’s private sexual lives and the things they don’t usually talk about—not even to their partners. Many people have come out to me as having had affairs. I can often hear their voices shake a little in wanting to tell the truth, to [...]
I’ve spent years studying how confidence works and I’ve found it’s the thing everyone wants the most and yet people don’t know how to develop it and often don’t recognize their own unique confidence style. Here’s the thing about confidence: it is not one size fits all. After studying confidence for years and how it [...]
It’s easy to get stuck sexually and just stay there for years. I recently heard from a client who has been so stuck not enjoying sex and avoiding it for so long that she can’t even bring herself to pleasure. When we get stuck in “park” or “neutral” for long, it can be very difficult [...]
I am continually amazed at the negativity people carry about their sexuality and at how much they will disconnect and defect from this part of themselves, as if it is outside of us. Your sexuality is the core of who you are. It is the place where you came from, when there was a conception, [...]
What does it mean to desire, to “own your wanting”? What gets in the way of owning it, of saying “yes, this is what I want and I won’t feel bad about my wanting”? We tend to want based on the wants of those with whom we’ve grown up, of the desires we’ve seen modeled. If we [...]
Most of us learn about sexuality in the context of fear and were taught to be afraid of sexuality on some level: you might get hurt. You might get an STI. You might get pregnant. He might treat you badly. She might trap you. You might get raped. Most of American sex education focuses on [...]
We need space for unfettered play, languorous mornings, lots of affection and flirtation, sex in unusual places and erotic thrills.
Affairs are a common way people are forced to face how they are living and relating.