Women go to People Pleaser University, they specialize in Caretaking 101, and they graduate with a diploma in “Not Enough”. Even the most powerful feminists are not immune to this unwritten curriculum.
Avoidance will generally mean that you will not get your needs met or feel seen and heard in a relationship, because it ultimately will require others to read your mind or figure out what is going on without you telling them.
You’re not special. Not like that. You are only the victim if you decide you are
There is a difference between someone who is authentically self-possessed and one who is just creating an image to be viewed, almost like a cardboard doll.
There have been many questions about archetypes and some intrigue about them, so this week I thought I'd give you a little primer about my approach to these archetypes and why they matter.
Nearly every person I work with as a sex coach must look at their relationship to people pleasing at some point as part of our work.
I am often amazed at what people think it’s okay to say to others, especially people who are perfect strangers. I was a sponsor at a business event last week and a woman came up to me at my booth and said, “Are you the sex lady? You’re a real slut aren’t you?”
In my life and work, I have been very attuned to the ways that people give away their power because they want other people to like them. I work with my clients and students on these issues directly.
Frank Bernard Dicksee, "Chivalry" (1885) If you were raised female you were taught on some level to be the damsel or princess. This is a call to the princesses in the world who are ready to step into their power in a big way. If you are powerful in many ways in the [...]
If you don’t invest time and energy into your sexual satisfaction, it becomes like that damn light bulb in the hall closet that burned out so long ago, you can’t quite remember; you just feel irritated and annoyed each time you go to flick the switch and nothing happens.