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Toxic Masculinity is Bubbling Over, but the Erotic Always Wins

We spent the weekend with 75 women committed to connecting to and healing their sexual selves, and playing in an erotic playground at Fire Woman Retreat. It was a weekend filled with light, inspiration and beauty. When we came out of it, we heard that there had been...

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Sexual Possibility After Divorce

I have made a bold declaration over the last several years, the years since my divorce. Divorce is a developmental stage of adulthood. Every adult who is in partnership will, at some point lose a partner to divorce or death and will have to find their way again. The...

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How White Supremacy and Misogyny Connect

This past weekend I was honored to go see a man whose music I grew up on and loved shine his heart-light on a crowd of adoring long-time fans. Neil Diamond is a gem, one of the greatest songwriters of our modern world, and a true gentleman. He ended his show as I...

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“Is it Possible to Drop Our Identities And Just Be Human?”

I was listening to the Dalai Lama talk this morning in San Diego about how much happier and less lonely we’d be if we saw ourselves as one human family and stopped disconnecting and separating ourselves from one another with “I’m this” and “You’re that.” At Los...

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The Connection Between Sexuality & Spirituality

Often made complicated, the connection between spirituality and sexuality is so much more simple than we make it. Spirituality is our connection to our spirit, to the non-physical aspects of self. We grow our spirituality to grow as an eternal being, as a life-force...

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Why Facebook Censors Sex Educators

Many sex educators, myself included, have found themselves unable to promote their workshops and offerings on Facebook's advertising platform because Facebook deems it to be explicit. In this Facebook Live session, we talk about the environment of censorship and...

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3 Myths About Sex that Keep Couples Disconnected

Because sexuality is so personal and private, we don’t talk enough about it. Even in this age when we can pull up all kinds of info about sex on the web, it’s easy to get stuck in the caverns of our own minds, confused about sex and attached to beliefs that just...

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A Thank You Note to President Obama, US Citizen

On a day when so many prepare to march in protest to the newly inaugurated President, I want to take a moment to celebrate the great man who has just left the office.  Let the focus today be on true legacy. What Obama did for women, LGBTQ folks, and acceptance of...

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What Social Justice, Pleasure & Consent Have in Common

Social Justice is sexy in the way that consent is sexy. When people are cared for, when their needs and desires are met, when they are invited to participate—whether it’s in democracy or sex—when we choose to work collaboratively, it’s hot. It’s attractive. It’s...

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Intersectionality & What It Means to “Call In”

In the sexuality field we have been having rich conversations over the last many years about both intersectionality and what it means to “call someone in” rather than “call them out.” Too often when we have an issue with something someone has done or said we feel the...

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What to do when sex dwindles in a longterm relationship

Anyone who has been in a relatively sober long-term relationship knows how challenging it can be to maintain a juicy sexual life over the long run. Your sex life may or may not have been exciting and fun in the beginning. Regardless of how exciting it was or was not,...

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Sexuality Breathes Life into the Revolution

We like to categorize and compartmentalize nearly everything. It can help us manage the many parts of our life rather than feel lost in all of it and it can sometimes prevent some of the overwhelm that otherwise shows up. Yet life is interconnected, as are all the...

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Trailblazing for Liberation: Gender and the Election

On Wednesday, November 9 half of our country was stunned by the dreaded and realized result that Donald Trump was now our President-elect.   Every woman who ever stood for something felt the deep sting Secretary Clinton experienced, as she stood and faced us in...

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Predatory Behavior All Women Know

Last week’s debate was disturbing on many levels. The way Donald Trump loomed menacingly over Hillary Clinton, using threatening body language and posturing chilled most women to the bone. Why? Because we all know what that predation feels like. Watching it on a...

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Why I’ve Had Over 1,000 Pelvic Exams

From 2001 to 2011, I had the distinctively unique position of teaching medical and nursing students, and occasionally residents, in every major medical institution in New York City how to give proper breast and pelvic exams. What made this work so unique was that I...

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