50 Shades of Pseudo Kink + How to Kink it Up Right

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If Valentine’s Day Were Self-Love Day

bodies entwined

It’s that time of year again when no one can go out to dinner if they didn’t plan it out a month in advance, every flower in the county is spoken for and brain chemistry spikes with all that chocolate consumption. Some lovers look forward to a … [Continue reading]

Love is an Action


Last week we said goodbye to my grandfather as he went to the next world. Some family members showed up and some didn’t. As we were talking about how sweet it was to be together, I said that I believe love is an action that starts with how you … [Continue reading]

When Your Sexual Energy is Blocked


We all have a bowl inside us, a well, a deep gorge of energy that is our core sexual energy. For many people, that energy is buried deep, smothered, depleted, seemingly inaccessible. For others, it is alive, vibrant, flowing and rich. No matter the … [Continue reading]

4 Truths About Female Ejaculation: The Debate Continues

water face

Female ejaculation is still a hot button topic as demonstrated by the response to the research study just published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine that was then misappropriated by the popular website I Fucking Love Science. In the 90s when … [Continue reading]

Planning Makes Sex Hot: How to Have the Sexy Year of Your Dreams in 2015

date hands

People have many myths and misunderstandings about sexuality, and in my work one of the biggest myths I’ve heard over and over about sex is that it should just “be spontaneous” or that it “should just happen.” Somehow the idea that sex … [Continue reading]

Understanding Sexual Evolution: a conversation with Destin Gerek

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Check out Destin's event, Evolve LIVE: The Sexual/Spiritual Transformation, January 16-18th 2015. Destin has invited me to be part of his panel on the evolution of sexual consciousness; I can't wait to continue this important conversation! Use … [Continue reading]

Sexual Agency in a Sex-Negative World

woman on bed

This week I'm sharing a piece that was recently published in the premier edition of Sensheant Magazine.   I love how it feels to be in full sexual agency, to feel like I am fully in control of my sexuality, my body, my pleasure, my … [Continue reading]

Racist Homicide Cannot Be Business As Usual #BlackLivesMatter #ItEndsToday

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Usually, I write about sex and relationships and what it means to be the best version of yourself. This week I simply cannot ignore that the United States is not being the best version of itself. It can’t even look itself in the mirror and be … [Continue reading]

Running Away from Your Sex Life


As we enter the holiday season of busy travel and social engagements, I thought I’d mention a few things about travel and your sex life. It’s way too easy to put your sex life on hold until “I’ll deal with that next year,” becomes your … [Continue reading]